{"product_id":"even-if-im-not","title":"Even if I'm Not","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEven if I'm Not\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe Greatest Loss. The Way Forward. A Mother's Story.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eMy first words as a mother were, \"Don’t drop him.” It was as if I knew, even before I held my first child, that I wouldn’t be able to hold onto my children.\u003cbr\u003eWe were the family who lost half our children; over a ten-year period, four of our eight children died, as infants, from a rare mitochondrial disorder. After the babies died, I was sure that nothing terrible could happen to us ever again. \u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNot to us.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThen, Yossi, our oldest child and only son, drowned six weeks before his wedding day.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eAs a child, Yossi loved playing with words. Once, when he was getting ready for school, I said to him, \"There are bagels on the counter if you’re hungry.”\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eHe said, \"Even if I’m not.”\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\"What?”\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\"The bagels are on the counter even if I’m not hungry.”\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eAfter Yossi died, I grappled with long-held beliefs: Hashem is close; everything that happens has a purpose; and our neshamos continue to exist after we leave This World. The comfort of these truths was there for me, if I was ready to accept it, but also—as I learned—\"even if I’m not”… \u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eAt first, I couldn’t find my way forward. I felt like Hashem was saying, I’m asking you to do something impossible. Do it anyway. Even If I’m Not is the story of doing the impossible. \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBy: Devorie Kreiman\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Israel Bookshop","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":49981954851056,"sku":"210000049065","price":26.25,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0306\/3080\/5639\/files\/xd92xzs41ttog06ekwwf.jpg?v=1783378004","url":"https:\/\/judaicaspot.com\/products\/even-if-im-not","provider":"Judaica Spot","version":"1.0","type":"link"}